Blog Layout
Is Your Elderly Loved One Being Repetitive? What Not To Say
Lisa Reisman • Aug 29, 2019
How can we help you today?
Is Your Elderly Loved One Being Repetitive? What Not To Say
We’ve all done it. We ask someone what day it is, laughingly explaining that we’ve lost a day somewhere. We put the dishwashing cloth in the fridge and put the milk out on the kitchen counter. Many people do these things while they’re worried or concentrating on other things. Sometimes people just zone out. The mind will do some amazing things in order to keep us from becoming ill with worry. We laugh about it, but when it comes to our elderly parents or relatives it suddenly ceases to be funny. Are we assuming our senior parents and relatives are not worried like we are? What mistakes are we making when our elderly relatives are being repetitive?
“Mom, You Just Said That”
Repeating words, stories or movements appear to increase as we grow older. We walk the same path because we’ve done it for years. We ask questions or make a statement because we are thinking of dozens of things. We honestly don’t remember asking or stating something. The elderly, however, often understand that their memories are slipping. They feel embarrassed, frustrated and helpless. If a formerly sharp senior parent or relative begins repeating things, it is imperative to the senior’s mental and emotional health for you to realize they aren’t deliberately annoying you. Once this is clear to you, it becomes a simple matter of replying, “Thanks, Mom, I’ve always loved that story”, or “I see. Thanks for the information, Dad”.
“That Sweater was Already Folded”
When we sit in the ER waiting to hear about our family member’s progress, we tear a tissue to bits, we gnaw on our fingernails or we trace every curl in our hair with a finger. These habits are an outlet for worry and fear. On the other hand, when a senior parent or relative does these things, we fear for the health of their minds. Endlessly folding and refolding a handkerchief, when the senior was a formerly bright and vital human being, can be heartbreaking to watch. We can almost picture the vacuum in the mind of the elder, and we fear Alzheimer’s. The senior, however, might consider himself helping as he folds the handkerchief again. When it’s just right, he knows you will be happy with his effort. He has been of assistance to you. For anyone to make him feel less than a helpful member of the family would be very hurtful.
“Why Haven’t You Locked the Door”?
Everyone forgets their keys in the door every now and then. Some people live in neighborhoods where they can leave the keys in the car and the door to the house unlocked. They are assured, through experience, that nothing will be taken. When it comes to our parents, though, or our senior aunts and uncles, we don’t trust anyone for any reason. When our elderly relatives don’t lock the door, it never occurs to us that maybe they can’t. Are their fingers knotted from osteoarthritis or rheumatoid arthritis? Do their hands shake from simply age or a disease such as palsy? Our relatives might simply forget to lock the door. In any case, checking on them frequently will ease our minds that they are safe.
“Why are There No Groceries in the Kitchen”?
Forgetting to stock the fridge and cabinets has nothing to do with being repetitive. It has a lot to do, however, with aging and the onset of dementia. When a formerly outstanding cook suddenly offers no exquisite concoctions to visitors, or when he or she begins to lose weight, it’s time to look at the situation. Does the elderly family member not have a ride to the grocery store? Is the financial situation indicative of a less than healthy food budget? Can the senior no longer hold a saucepot in his or her hand? Can the elder not see the small writing on the stove and oven dials? Many seniors tend to rely on programs like Meals on Wheels or nearby church aid for their food for many reasons, such as those listed above. If your senior parent or family member needs a well-stocked kitchen and someone to cook for him or her, then it’s time to call for help.
We are that help. Complete Care At Home has years of experience helping the children of senior family members take care of their parents and other elderly family members. Our staff is very well-screened and highly trained to perform home care services from medication administration to companionship and from cleaning, cooking and bathing to transportation. You only want the best for your parents and senior family members. We’ll be happy to answer your questions and provide information
so you can make the best possible choice for your senior loved ones.
Learn about the common symptoms of COVID-19, reasons why older people have a wide variety of symptoms & how to spot early signs of COVID-19 in the elderly.
Learn about the symptoms of COVID-19 & how it spreads. Know the difference between asymptomatic & symptomatic.
Learn why the elderly have a higher risk for severe illness from COVID-19 & why the risks are higher when they have underlying health conditions.
Learn about the signs when your loved one faces comprehension difficulties. Know how a cognitive impairment disease can affect you & your loved ones.
You’ve heard the name many times by now— Coronavirus (or COVID-19) is a disease that’s become so deadly it’s spiraled us into a global pandemic. For those unfamiliar with how it got its name, in COVID-19, 'CO' stands for 'corona,' 'VI' for 'virus,' and 'D' for the disease. According to the CDC, “coronavirus” is actually an umbrella term for a family of viruses that can cause illness in animals or humans.
No matter what age, we all have moments of confusion. But when your elderly loved one is consistently exhibiting these signs, it might be because s/he is undergoing cognitive impairment. Having difficulty comprehending is a common sign these problems; however, it is often brushed aside as "old age." The person experiencing these difficulties may make excuses: the TV shows today are too complicated, their family members talk too fast, the lights are too dim to read. Ignoring the signs of comprehension difficulties, though, just make life harder for everyone involved. Comprehension and Confusion Comprehension is the opposite of confusion. Comprehension is a complex process in the brain through a system of nerves and chemicals, and it involves language, recognition, and function processes. Cognitive impairment disorders like dementia and Alzheimer's disrupt those complex processes. It can manifest as sudden memory loss, impaired motor coordination, and other more subtle thought processes that we will discuss. When someone has difficulty with comprehension, s/he has trouble putting together the various actions needed to perform a task. For example, your mom might need a cup from the cupboard. In order to do so, she must first decide she wants the cup. Then she might need to get out of her chair, walk across the kitchen, raise her hand, open the cupboard, and take the cup out of the cupboard. If she has difficulty with comprehension, she will have a hard time putting all of these elements to work to achieve her goal, which might result in several different outcomes: she could fall, break the cup, or just forget what she was doing before she reaches the cupboard. She knows what she wants to do but has trouble making all the connections necessary to get there. How Cognitive Impairment Affects Your Loved One Difficulty comprehending is frustrating for your elderly loved one and for you, but the first step toward helping your loved one is understanding what s/he is experiencing. Here are some examples of how someone with dementia or Alzheimer's disease might have trouble comprehending everyday situations. TV/books: Someone with dementia might not be able to follow a basic storyline and could not tell somebody else what is going on in the TV show or book. Social situations: Someone with dementia might see two children playing and interpret that they are fighting or vice versa. The person with dementia may step in and try to resolve the situation without realizing what is actually happening. Conversations: As with the TV/book example, someone with dementia can't follow an everyday conversation . S/he doesn't know who or what is being discussed and especially cannot tell when the subject matter has changed. Time: Someone with trouble comprehending will have difficulty telling time and might not know whether it is day or night. How Cognitive Impairment Affects You Because of these comprehension difficulties, the person experiencing dementia or Alzheimer's disease will rely on the people around him/her to tell him/her what is going on. For instance, your loved one may constantly ask you to repeat yourself. S/he may also have trouble following instructions. These situations can be aggravating for you, particularly if they are new, however it is important to understand that your loved one is not trying to bother you by failing to follow directions or asking you to repeat information over and over. These are symptoms of cognitive impairment , and neither you nor they can control it. If your family member begins to exhibit any of these signs, take him or her to your physician with a description of the comprehension difficulties you've noticed so that s/he has plenty of information for a cognitive function assessment. If the doctor diagnoses dementia or Alzheimer's, ask specific questions about treatment so that you can do your part to serve your loved one despite mild cognitive impairment. It is important to get help for your loved one, and there is no reason for you to care for your loved one alone. Caring for an aging relative requires time, patience, and expert care. Complete Care At Home can help you create a customized plan to meet the unique needs of your loved one with dementia or Alzheimer's disease. Contact us today for an expert assessment.
Learn about aggression, dementia & how you can cope with people experiencing those illnesses through home health care services by Complete Care At Home.
Alzheimer's and dementia are debilitating diseases. Learn more about the differences and signs of dementia and Alzheimer's disease from normal forgetfulness.
Learn about the signs your loved ones might need home care services & how complete care at home services can help your loved ones to live safely.
Learn about the definition of bruise, hematoma, common causes of bruises in older adults, and tips on how to prevent bruises on your elderly loved ones.